Thursday, May 30, 2013

Thoughts as the night winds down

There are a few things that I admire about myself. I do not mention them with a conceited, arrogant mentality. It's more about giving myself credit and acknowledging that I'm not a completely hopeless person.

I admire that I can always dig deep and be happy. I believe that at my core, I am a naturally happy person. Sometimes, it's just a matter of letting that person surface past whatever negatives things are surrounding my life. I also admire that I can make others smile or laugh. I have been told that I brighten days -- HUGE compliment. I admire that even though family and friends thought I was crazy for giving animals so much significance, I held on strongly to my feelings for them. Now I work in the veterinary field and have been a successful vegetarian for over five years.

Finally, I admire that I am able to forgive. For the most part. I could never forgive somebody hurting my critters, I don't think. Honestly, that is the only unforgivable offense that I can come up with without thinking too hard about it...

Is it possible that I am too forgiving, though? How many times do I have to accept apologies from one person? How many times do I have to make excuses for the same person? How many times do I have to remind myself that I love this person enough to forgive time and time again?

If I am, in fact, too forgiving towards this person, is that really something to admire about myself? Is that something to be proud of? Or should I be ashamed? Am I really just being a complete fool for practically shrugging my shoulders about things and moving on? Am I letting this person walk all over me?

These aren't fun questions to ponder.

Can I just go back to being a happy daisy?

That sounds like a plan...

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