I got the funk.

It pains me to write this because I never EVER get sick, but alas, the funk has hit me and is being stubborn and won't go away.

It started last Wednesday night. I went to bed with a scratchy feeling in my throat. It took me a while to fall asleep that night and after only a few hours of sleeping, Canelo woke me up asking me to take him outside. That was a little before 5AM. I usually wake up at six. Once I had gotten up and taken him outside, though, I was never able to fall asleep again.

I went to work that morning and had very little energy, which I blamed on the lack of sleep. It was a slow day at work and management was starting to send people home. I was one of the lucky ones so I hopped on the train, made my way home, and went straight to bed. Sneezing, head hurting, body not wanting to do much of anything.

I stayed in bed all day hoping to be better by Friday morning. That didn't happen. I was sent home again. Stayed in bed Friday, stayed in bed Saturday, missed my best friend's birthday Saturday night, caught up on schoolwork yesterday, missed a gathering with friends yesterday, find myself still in bed today. Headache is gone. Energy is coming back to me. Still with the terrible runny nose. Throw a nasty, but productive cough into the mix. You know... the kind with the phlegm. Lovely, huh?

This is so annoying. It's been years since I have had what I am self-diagnosing as a cold and I just do not remember how long it usually takes for these suckers to run their course through me. I have not taken anything because most medications just alleviate the symptoms and the symptoms are really just my body's immune system trying to get rid of the funk.

All I know is that regardless of how I am feeling tomorrow, I have floor tickets to Lady Gaga and I will wait all day in the rain for a good spot among the crowd. Also, I can't afford to miss work anymore. I have school to pay for and more fun to have.

Hot, I know.

Here's hoping that all you lovelies do not catch this plague as well. Happy Monday and have a fantastic week!

Into week two

My health and wellness plan is off to a good start. I only wish that today wasn't such a rainy day so that I could go for a run. I will have to play catch up this weekend instead. I also wish that the sun wouldn't set so early so that I could run after getting home from work, but let's not get back into the whole "I Hate Winter" discussion once more.

The point is that I am eating well, exercising regularly, paying attention to my intake of nutrients (especially those lacking in a vegetarian diet), and starting the year off with much-needed energy. The one thing I have to work on is sleeping better during my work week. Oh, that's a tough one for me.

I have started the new semester this week after pondering whether or not to take a break for the first eight weeks and take once class from March to May. I decided to just stick with the program and get shit done instead. The class I am taking should be interesting. It's about health care in America...

I have other things on my plate as well, which is why I was so hesitant to register for school. I have to find the right balance in life, though, and not let school and work rule my world. Overall, I have a feeling that this will be a great year for me, as long as I take it week by week, remain focused, and remember to enjoy all that is happening to me.

More thoughts about critters

Today was a weird day at work. Although I have been through it myself, it breaks my heart to see families so distraught over the loss of a furry family member. My heart breaks for the brave little critters, but also for the people whose lives will have a terrible void that can not be filled. I still cry over the ones I have lost along the way, even though it's been years since I have had to endure such losses. I guess, being the positive thinker that I am, it is at least comforting to know that those animals were loved and that good, loving pet-owners do exist.

When I got home from work this evening, old Canelo Dog enthusiastically greeted me. He hopped about and wagged his tail. Every day I see that tail wag is a day I have a reason to smile. Smartie followed me around when I got home and started meowing for food. I found Cholula all snuggled up underneath a blanket on my bed. Miguel purred for me when I gave him a "hello" pat on the head.

That's really all I have to say. Love your critters, y'all. Spoil them and always be thankful for the moments you are lucky enough to share with them.

Critters

My girls seem both seem to enjoy playing with my hair while I sleep. And by my girls, I mean my two daughters. And by my two daughters, I mean Cholula (my ferret) and Smartie (my kitty).

Cholula likes to take my hair, "dig" into it, tangle it up into some sort of nest, and sleep in it. Of course, I feel and hear her while she does this, she does it on my pillow just by my ear, and I try my best not to move my head at all while she is sleeping there. It does not matter how uncomfortable I become because these moments are the ones that I will be sure to miss one day.

Smartie's shenanigans are much more destructive. This smooth criminal likes to bat at my loose hair with her paws, capture a few strands with her claws, and proceed to chew on those strands, sometimes to the point of chewing them off completely. There have been mornings when I wake up with a few wet strands and notice chunks of hair on my bed. Can I please blame all bad hair days on her? It's the least I should be entitled to, right? I refuse to ban her from my bedroom while I sleep. The poor sweetheart would cry all night if I did. I have tried to sleep with my hair in a braid, but I just can not do it. Ah, well.

Such are the joys of welcoming four-legged critters into your home.

I may as well mention my boys. By my boys, I mean my sons. And by my sons, I mean Canelo (my dog) and Miguel (my other kitty).

Old man Canelo Dog. He is now twelve years old and (thankfully) aging well. He is aging, nonetheless, however, and there are many signs and changes to prove it. It makes me sad to think that the best of his years have already passed and that I may only have a few years with him left. So, this kid can pretty much get away with anything at this point.

He can tear up my sheets, not because he is destructive, but because I now allow him to sleep on my bed while I am away and in an effort to make himself comfortable, he tears at my bed. He can pretty much force me to sleep in the most uncomfortable positions when he is afraid of thunder and wants to sleep on the bed with me. He can stink up my room by going weeks without a bath because he hates them and I don't want to torture him. He can jump on furniture with his muddy feet because he prefers to just lay down and relax on my comfy couch right after his long walks and I am not quick enough with the paw-wiping. He can get his fur ALL OVER everything around him (my blankets, my clothes, inside my shoes, everything). It is all okay.

My sweet boy. He has paid his dues and has been a wonderful dog throughout his years. I feel as though I am in debt to him. I can not tell you enough how much he means to me.

Then there's Miguel. Miguel is my fat and lazy cat who does nothing but sleep, eat, and take care of potty business. He is the friendliest cat, with the softest fur and loudest purr, and is the perfect cuddle pet for cold weather. Sometimes, especially when I am tired or stressed, all I want to do is sit on the couch, get lost in mindless television, and pet Miguel while he is loafing on my lap. It's perfect. I love that fat cat.

So I have begun my year absolutely in love with my critters, thankful for every day with them, and amazed by their little personalities.

Happy new year, y'all.

The sun will come out...

Tomorrow, tomorrow

I should have sang that song to myself yesterday when I was in such a funk. Being called in to work at 4:30 pm and staying there until 12:30 am didn't really help that funk. I got home a little after one because I missed dinner, was extremely hungry after work, and decided to stop at Whataburger. Ohmuhgoodness, Whataburger is crowded in the wee hours of a Saturday night. So many drunks!

It took me a while to unwind after I made it home, but I eventually fell asleep sometime after 3:00. This morning, I was out of bed by 9:00. The sun was shining brightly in my room and that was my cue to get the hell up and get going. Today, I am in a much livelier mood.

It may be my new phone. It may be knowing that I only have today and tonight left of on-call training. It may be that I get to see my honey and my family tomorrow. It may be that I will be watching Les Miserables in just two days. It may be that it makes me happy to see my 14-year-old cousin happy and that I love being a positive influence for him. It may be that I spent a large part of the morning just watching my critters play and interact with one another. It may be that I am watching the Cowboys and keep seeing promos for the upcoming Cotton Bowl game featuring my Fightin' Texas Aggies and Johnny Football.

Whatever it is, it is good. It was needed. I am thankful.

All you have is time time time

I have said this before: I need to stop posting all my thoughts and sharing links, photos, and videos on facebook. I need to post them here instead. Here, where they will not get lost in a mass of soundbytes, images, rants, and raves. Here, where people who actually care to know about what is on my mind will come to find out. Here, where I can actually put my thoughts into more elaborate words.

The year is almost over and winter is officially here. With winter's arrival, we will slowly start making our way towards longer days once again. Wintertime is without a doubt my least favorite time of year. Geeze, it sucks all the energy out of me and I constantly have to remind myself that I am, in fact, a happy daisy. Thankfully, the days will now start getting longer and with Daylight Saving Time beginning in a few months, I will get even more hours of sunlight in my days.

It's frustrating, not being able to enjoy the sun at all. I am a child of summer. Astrologically, the sun is my ruling planet. My name means "the day's eye" because the flower who shares its name with me looks like the sun. I... need... more... sun! Warm temperatures are not enough to get me through this horrid season. I need some rays. Bad.

Another good thing about the year progressing to the point we are at now is that I will no longer be on-call every other weekend. My goodness, I will be getting my life back! Granted, I'll still have school and my normal work schedule, but my weekends, all of them, will belong to me once more. This means spending more time with my critters, friends, family, and Dustin. This also means finally putting a membership voucher I bought a month ago to use. Dance classes, here I come! Also, I will have time to open an Etsy shop soon. Details will follow. I am beyond excited.

So here's to the end of the year and to time being on my side.

Happy holidays, y'all. Be safe.

I want to hibernate

I have nothing exciting to report. No events to share with you. Nothing that I feel worthy of a nice long blog post. Life has revolved around work and school. Striking a balance among those two and the rest of my life has not been a challenge because I am not letting it be. I simply ignore other aspects of life and do what I do.

It is getting old, though. I don't feel drained, but I am not as fanciful as I usually am. I feel that if anything fun and adventurous were to happen in life at the present moment, it would all be forced. I hate forcing things.

I don't know if it's been my ridiculous rotations at work, my lack of exercise, or the fact that the sun does not play as long as it does in the summer. Maybe it's a combination of things. Regardless, this is as close to being in a funk as I have been in a while. What a drag.

Hopefully, I can snap out of it. December 21st is only nine days away. It's the day when the sun hides the most. After that, the days start getting longer and the calendar begins its steady approach towards the vernal equinox, which has to be one of my favorite days of the year!

I truly despise winter time. Even with the holiday breaks, it's just such a bother! Ooof.

Towards the end

We are finally in that post-Halloween period when I feel I have nothing to look forward to other than the arrival of spring. Last year and the year before, I kept reminding myself that I had the end to look forward to. Dustin's birthday on December 29th, our anniversary on the 30th, and New Year's Eve on the 31st.

Things have not looked so promising this year.

First of all, several days ago, celebrating his birthday and our anniversary were both events I was going to remove from my calendars. I broke up with the guy, not because I was being brash and overly dramatic, but because I felt that I truly needed to. I would rather not go into all the details here, but I will state that overall, things just did not feel right in our relationship. Then he wrote something that I truly wish I was not thinking about right now because here I go feeling angry about it again...

[pause]

That just pushed me over the edge and I was done. Then he kept trying to talk to me even though I was refusing to reply to his text messages. That got annoying. Honestly, I think the main reason I even agreed to talk to him was because I wanted to get things off my chest. It wasn't because I wanted to work on things, really. Still, I have so many feelings and emotions invested in him that I thought it would be worth it to give our relationship another try.

It's weird. That's all I will say about it.

Anyhow, as of now, I do have his birthday and our anniversary to look forward to, as well as six crazy weeks of work. I have actually taken to twitter to complain about how much I'll be working. Silly me.

Yes, I will be exhausted; yes, I would rather spend time with the people/critters I love; yes, it's going to be brutal. I have to spin these thoughts in a positive direction, though, and so I am left thinking this: I am a bad ass. Plain and simple. Only bad asses can handle everything I have going on without falling a part just a bit. Right? Right.

Even bad asses need their sleep, however. Off I go!

The perks of being a daisy flower

Every now and then, it hits me just how much I love Dustin. I love him for being who he is, but I am also hit with just how much he loves me, and I love him even more for that. Almost three years into our relationship and he still tells me that he loves me multiple times throughout the day. He wishes me sweet dreams each and every night. Sometimes, he tells me that I'm gorgeous and that he is proud of me. It's an amazing feeling, knowing that a person who was a complete stranger throughout your entire life has grown to love and cherish you in a relatively short amount of time. I hope he realizes that I feel the same way about him and that my life is better because of him and because I am in love.

It's a gloomy day today. The sun has not made an appearance what with low clouds hanging about. After running a few errands this morning and early afternoon, I now find myself at home wanting to simply relax. Relaxation will be hard to come by these next few months as I will be training to become an on-call technician. What this means is that every other week, I can be called upon to go to work after-hours if there is an emergency. After-hours are as follows: weekdays after 4PM and weekends, of course. So in just over an hour, I have to be glued to the phone in case I am needed.

This will go on through December, I believe. Oh dear.

So, I can't really bring myself to relax now that it's almost four. I'm working on laundry and may read for a little while. Two nights ago, I realized (through Facebook) that several friends have watched the film adaptation of The Perks of Being a Wallflower. As a result, I started to read it again. It has been an interesting re-read.

When I first read the book, I was a lonesome 19-year-old girl whose closest friends all lived miles and miles away due to her being in college. All the boys I crushed on had girlfriends who I thought were much cuter than me. I didn't know how to do my makeup and I hated my hair. I was quiet, but observant. I focused on school and sleeping and was hardly social at all. When I did have time to spare, I wanted to listen to music, make the best mixed cds, and read as many books as I possibly could. That was my life and it was the reason I related to the characters in Perks so well, even if my experiences were not as extreme as theirs.

Reading the book again takes me back to that time and I remember why I was so happy to have discovered this literary masterpiece. I am halfway through it now and I am actually even happier to have rediscovered it. Perspective. I do realize that I have really made my life happen and have long left my awkward teenager phase. There are times when I feel dissatisfied with things, no doubt, but I am pleased with the person I have become, the relationships that I have built and kept, and the way I spend my time. Honestly, I feel very accomplished and look forward to the future as much as ever. Such progress!

Incidentally, if you haven't read the book I'll inform you that it is written as a series of letters that the main character writes to a friend whom he does not even know. A stranger. The way it was written inspired me to blog because I felt that, in essence, I would be doing the same. Telling my story to anonymous strangers only it would be via the world wide web. It became therapeutic for me to write and I have been hooked ever since, although I do not write as much as I originally did. I guess I really have grown. Less "therapy" is now needed.

What a day. What thoughts and what memories. Thanks for reading.

Love,
Daisy

September post!

Well, friends, the times have been busy times. September was full of fun, work, school, and creativity. September was full of friends, family, critters, and my dude.

I had my hair colored for the first time. I went to Midnight Yell, Pride, Oktoberfest, and The Ballpark. I painted, I sewed, I volunteered, and I ran in my first race. School is in full-swing. Work is work. At least forty glorious hours a week. Lots of football and baseball.

October promises not to slow down. Work will be more intense as I start training to become an on-call technician. My super-accelerated class will end, accompanied by a final exam, and a new class will begin subsequently. The State Fair has arrived and I have to go at least twice. Haunted houses, girlfriends? Macbeth at Addison Circle Park, Dustin? Veggie State Fair, anyone? Oh, and the return of The Walking Dead.

Cooler weather means more times outdoors. Oh, what a world! Life is but a dream!

I must remind myself to sleep...

Sleep.